Did anyone watch Top Chef tonight? Hell yeah, Chicago! We’re a food town, baby.
Ever been to an Indian latin Fusion joint called Vermilion ?! CHI towwwwnnnn !!!
Location - Meatpacking
Date - Now, in the moment, The Present ( Nov.3 2011)
If you have not taken a trip into the pretentious neighborhood of Chelsea, take a trip to Pastis or Sephora or Bagatelle round the corner. Seraphina ? why here ?
Wait in line to be shunted around by Maitre ‘d and colleague to a corner table thats wobbly/falling apart in chunks or just too close to an unruly french tourist. Best case scenario, listen intently for the clammering and clanging of a hammer from construction workers accross the street while you sip on a citron presse. Hopefully the refreshing lemon-juice/ade doesnt remind you of something out of a can.
The food was amazing-ish. Why cant they take the ham out of the croque madam ? But the ham comes right off the “ham & cheese croissant” ? Regardless the fries make up for the unnecessary banter and ridicule.
Routine 13 - All hell breaks lose.
The devil incarnate is visiting. Hence there is no Hollandaise on my steak, wait my steak isnt here yet, and my server is in a dither. Its health inspection. Why isnt there any food coming out the kitchen ? Well Im ready to leave, I have to be at a meeting in 10. But if I do leave the waiter is going to have to pay for my meal ?!
Im frustrated and upset and tell the manager. So she offers me desert. What part of “I have be out of here in 10 minutes do you NOT understand woman ?” She seemed to look middle eastern of sorts. Irrelevant or related to her confusion of the english I was speaking quite audibly.
They requested my information because I had to leave. I wasnt too thrilled about giving away personal information especially since I was in a hurry - again. I better get dinner for free and a food rub or massage for the stress they put me through.
Hopefully its not health inspection the next time I come. O wait, Im not.
Subway Sequel: Lady filing her nails on the trian.. hurt my teeth. What does that annoying scraping sound have to do with teeth anyway ?!
Subway sequel: Wierd mexcian magician - pulled a rabbit out of his hat. Living, breathing, pink-nosed rabbit. He pulled a prank on my vision, because we all know there was no living, breathing, pink-nosed critter in that hat !!
Subway sequel: lost $40 on the train. To the weasel who has my money - sponsor a child in India or donate to the UNICEF or something. I’m saying. If you end up buying cocaine with it. I hope its the shittiest trip you’ve ever been on.
Subway sequel : subway - boxes of passengers headed in the same direction in different directions. Through the course of this journey they just might step on your feet, pick your wallet, play you a symphony or show off a talent such as card flipping. All of which you may or may not be interested in. Make the best of it. Smell an armpit or donate a dollar.